In this perplexing, complex and ultimately exciting existence I have experienced, one thing has been clear to my cohorts, family, and groups. My musical tastes profoundly express my current emotional track. The last ten months have seen a play list that would leave a radio dj's head spinning. I journeyed through a list sprouting from a girl that doesn't get it because it was all before she was born, to a cry of rearmament of the likes of Lamb of God, a realization of my weakness to have something poured that is cold an clear in the terms of AFI's "fainting spells". The rebirth of hope of turning the corner asking what was I thinking like Dierks Bently asked himself. An emotional shudder when the words of "Endlessly she said" meant the world to me. A month of Crookers running amok with David Guetta as we slid across the floor on the freedom of summer. Then, there was a crash, I once again looked for those fainting spells, The Used brought me a Box of Sharp Objects as I Buried Myself Alive and found beauty in Artwork.
Anyone who can follow that and listen to such a play list can see that it's been a Wild Ride...Unbound time recently. Perhaps I got hopeful that my recession had ended and went out spending the emotional currency I held with Dierks and the Crookers squad, inevitably causing a double dip, right before I was able to attain that great prosperity.
Much like the economy, and market forces of the real world, emotions and lives have ups and downs, growth and recession if you will. When I should have been the most headstrong, I didn't lose anything except my mind, which cost me dearly. I'm sure others have been on that path, weathered it and been made stronger, or unfortunately lost their way.
But nay! Never lose hope, we are the controllers of our own destiny, true we will make decisions that we may regret as I have made...and maybe they will be FUBAR, but in these stay strong, find your pillar and challenge the storm. Music is my lover, my mistress, my best friend, and the enemy that knows just how to get into my head. and I wouldn't trade this relationship for anything else. Truly. It does raise my spirits to hear that The One-Armed Scissor still can grace my ear however.
Hope, is being sure of what we hope for; and certain of what we do not see. So I choose to listen, and allow the notes to course through me and bit by bit figuring how to rebuild myself. It's one of the things that be in our lifetimes....Endlessly
Play list of the night:
Rise Against: Savior
The Used: Take it Away, and Empty With you
AFI: Miss Murder, 37mm, Beautiful Thieves, and Veronica Sawyer Smokes
At The Drive-In: Pattern Against User, and One-armed Scissor.
Next time: The origins of The Trickster, Maui
~Signed, The Trickster, Maui